Picture of Health
I met with the doc again today to follow up on my physical and bloodwork.I am happy to report that other than a dysfunctional reproductive system I am in excellent heath. Every test came back looking great. In fact I was complemented on the perfection of my urine and the health of my cervix. Everyone's got to have a talent, now I know mine! I feel like I should get some sort of award--The Perfect Plateletts Award? Honorable Mention Hemoglobin? High Achievement in Liver Function?
I had a nice moment with one of the nurses at the office. She came in to give me a copy of the adoption waiver paperwork and asked me about what we are doing. She got so excited for us, she even broke out into goosebumps! She said she knew the perfect baby was coming our way, and she promised to pray for us. Her absolute faith on this issue made me a little stronger too.
Our social worker has given me the contact info for some other families in the program, so hopefully I will be able to find a good support system in the area. It's funny, there is a huge international adoption network online, but I've been unable to find similiar sites for domestic. If anyone knows of some good resources, please comment.

After a productive morning, I've settled into the 6th Diana Gabaldon novel. I've now invested about 3500 pages in this saga. They may be 18th century, but they're my peeps! Jaime Fraser, where are you? There is something about a man in a kilt. . . let me wipe the drool from my face before continuing. I wonder if Eric would wear a kilt if I asked nicely. Christmas is coming up. . .

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year
Yes, my friends, it's that time again. . . Shark Week!
I am only marginally interested in sharks for most of the year, but when the Discovery Channel devotes an entire week to the fiendish fish, I can't help but get excited.

Contrast
Yeah. . . packing lunches, cleaning counters, and doing laundry just does not make my heart sing like a mountain hike. Go figure.

Westward Ho!
A more detailed description of our trip will have to follow later because I am pretty exhausted, however I couldn't hold off posting something tonight. While I hated Vegas with a passion, the trip to Utah was one of the most magical vacations I've ever had. I've seen a lot of beautiful landscape in my life, but southern Utah is probably the last wild country left in the US. It is almost painfully gorgeous. There were points when we would come across a new vista, and tears would come to my eyes.
My trip started last week with the conference in Vegas. The speakers were uniformly excellent and got me excited about teaching. I am supposed to put together a staff development talk on the material, so I will probably get started on that this week. the hotel where the conference took place, however, was mad crappy. It is probably on the short list of being torn down and replaced with newer monstrosities. To me Vegas represents everything I dislike about America--wastefulness, consumerism, utter lack of culture, environmental crimes, and moral depravity. The city has no soul. I could have dealt with all of this, however, if it were not also stupid expensive and infernally hot. It seems the main source of entertainment is wandering up and down the strip looking for "It." After spending 5 days there I still have no idea what "it" is, but I no longer really want to find it. Anyway, I could continue to complain about the city, but even thinking about it makes my stomach hurt.
I was very glad when Eric joined me and we took off for Utah. From there the trip took on an air of magic. We began by checking out the Lost City near the Valley of Fire in Nevada. We then spent a day exploring Zion National Park which impressed me with its abosulte majesty. From there we went to our base camp near Bryce Canyon. We enjoyed several days of hiking and back country exploration. We saw crumbling pink hoodoos, red canyons, raging waterfalls, winding roads, windswept sandstone, windows in rock, fresh springs, Pioneer Day fireworks, fairylands, and views that go on forever. As we were hiking at Cedar Break taking in the canyon while walking through the blaze of wildflowers, I had a feeling of profound peace and happiness. It was that sort of trip. Did I mention it was only 60 degrees? Perfect.
When we had to return to Vegas I had a bit of a meltdown which culminated in bursting into tears at the stupid craptastic Chinese restaurant that wanted me to pay extra for rice! I just couldn't pay for rice at a Chinese restaurant, so I sat there with a little bowl of spicy eggplant and sulked. It was not my crowning moment. Going from the perfect peace and stillness of the mountains to the madness of Vegas was a little too much to handle, especially since I had been away from home for over a week. The night was not a complete loss, however, as we were able to meet up with my sister and her hubby who were determined to help me like the city. Seeing friendly faces in the sea of Vegas crowds made the whole place more tolerable.
After battling the airport and stomach churning turbulence, we were met by my parents who had returned Toby and Clementine to the house. Now our happy little family has been reuinted, and we celebrated by spending all night cuddling on the couch. Yep, it's good to be home. Tomorrow the real world starts again. That's the important thing about vacation, though--it somehow makes dealing with the day to day more do-able.

Good Question
What could be better than pouring boiling water on my arm?

Oh yeah. . . NOT pouring boiling water on my arm. I knew there had to be something...

I'm running around today trying to get reading for my (Gulp) 7 a.m. flight tomorrow morning. The trip plans are complicated by the fact that I'm really going on two different trips--one to a professional conference in Vegas and the other hiking in the middle of nowhere Utah. The dress code is a wee bit different.

In other news I sent off our lovely profile today. One the one hand I'm excited, on the other I am a little upset because I have now done everything I can do to make this happen. Everything else is out of my control. I'd like to think that I'm not a control freak, but that's pretty self delusional.

Yikes. . . I just saw a commercial that involves William Shatner communicating with a lemur to reserve a hotel room. I am probably scarred for life. On the other hand I'm strangely curious to know if that is what lemurs really sound like. I've always had a soft spot for Madagascar's finest export.

Tonight we hit Shakespeare in the Park--it's Othello time. I'm trying to put together a picnic, but I've also been systematically emptying the fridge in preparation for leaving town. Pickings are slim. I think I have two slices of somewhat stale bread and a zucchini. I need inspiration.

I am packing up the laptop, and I will try to blog in Vegas. If I can't prepare for an update on the 29th!

Potty Humor
For some reason as I was driving to the gym today I had a flash back to one of the many road trips I used to take with my family when we were growing up. On our way to Minnesota to visit relatives I kept seeing signs on various buildings reading "TO LET." I was really confused and finally asked my dad, "Why don't they know how to spell toilet here in Minnesota?" I couldn't figure out why they all got it wrong!

Pattern Challenged
Despite each having a master's degree, neither my mother nor I can read a pattern to save our lives. Still, we muddled through and created the adorable jumper pictured above. We're now working on a skirt we designed made entirely of little strips of Japanese fabric which, if it turns out, will be terribly precious.
I'm almost done with the profile. My sister and a friend have looked at it for me and have provided great help. I hope to go to Kinkos today and get the whole thing copied and put together. My goal is to mail them to the social worker on Saturday.
Poor E has been working crazy hours this week. He's already put in 47 hours and plans on working most of the weekend. I don't like being left to my own devices. Then again as i am going to have to live without him for a few days maybe this is practice, like weaning?
My days of vacation are slowly and inexorably coming to a close, and I find I am happy about this. I really am not a person who can spend so much time alone. By the time I get back from Utah I will start going in to get my classroom ready. As this will most likley be my last year at this job, I am looking forward to making it my best, most effective teaching. It will be sad to leave the job, but I think I'm making the right decision. I cannot imagine trying to have a child working the crazy hours and driving for over an hour every day. I also am excited about going back to school. I am truly happiest when I am learning. Now I just have to 1)get in and 2) get the school to give me a fantastic financing package. Peanuts!

Getting Edumacated
I just signed Eric and I up for baby care classes at our local hospital. I was a little annoyed, however, since it was asking all about my due date and my pregnancy. I guess I understand, but it was a little like a slap in the face. It's silly to be offended, though, I'm sure 99 percent of their business with with pregnant women. I just hope I'm not really uncomfortable in the class with hugely pregnant people staring at my flat stomach. It kind of makes me wonder what other adoptive people do. Do they just try to wing it? I readily acknowledge that I need some education on this front. I am actually a little nutty about learning everything I can. I've thus far read 4 books on adoption as well as What to Expect in the 1st Year.
I've also been working more on the profile. On my way back from the gym I stopped by Michaels to figure out how I'm going to put it together. I bought cloud paper for the front page and sage green paper for the back, and I'm going to attach them with this cute flower brad. I also got some 3-D stickers to bring on the bling.
Birthmother%20letter.puba

I also enjoyed Book Club last night. We discussed the role of food in society. People tend to equate food with love and passion. Cooking is a love letter. I certainly have noticed this. I wake up early just to make Eric his breakfast and pack him a lunch as a way of saying "I love you." Creating a well-made, healthy dinner is something that makes me feel satisfied and fulfilled. I hesitate to say this because I am an intellectual and a career woman. It somehow feels like I am a throwback to the days of women barefoot and pregant. I think, however, that you can have both. The book club is filled with successful career women at the top of their game, most of whom have the same feelings about cooking and providing and loving. The whole thing made me want to get out our pasta maker and get crafty. We got it for the wedding, and I've yet to actually use it. I joke that maybe I'll try on our 5th, but I might just be inspired enough to break it out.
I'm leaving for Vegas on Sunday morning, and I'm trying to wrap up all unfinished projects. Should I be stressed on vacation?

Studied
Our home has been examined, we have been questioned, and our fire plans have been evaluated. Things look good. She was very positive and kind. All in all the process was smooth, and my stomach doesn't even hurt as much any more.
I called mom and dad in a panic this morning, knowing that spending the morning alone stewing was a bad idea, so mom and I went to get pedicures which was just what the proverbial doc ordered. I had a hot stone massage that was to die for. Now I want to go microwave a bunch of rocks from the backyard and have Eric rub me down. Somehow I don't think it works that way.
In any case after much fuss (mostly on my part) we are now one step closer to completing our family. Next step: completing our profile, putting it on beautiful paper and sending it off so the social worker can shop us around. I feel a little like I'm selling myself, but it's the good kind of whore, right?
Tonight I have book club. For the first time ever I did not read the book, but I could really use the friendship tonight. I think they'll understand.
I'm having a wonderful summer, but for a person used to having people around all the time, my summers do get a little lonely. I need a night out, and I most definitely need to celebrate our baby steps.

Crafty
I had another sewing lesson today, and I think I'm getting the hang of it now. So far I've made three skirts which I personally think are too cute. The pics are a litte difficult to interpret, but I promise they are cute. One of my coworkers gave me a bunch of fabric including this adorable cutout curtain material that I have now used in two summer skirts. I love the repurposing of the material. The green skirt is the first one that I made completely without help from mom--hurray for self-sufficiency! We are having fun, and I go back on Thursday to finish the jumper we are working on. I will never buy clothes again!
I'm trying not to brood about tomorrow because that really never helped anything. The house is as clean as it can be. I've tried to think of every safety issue possible. I even bought sunflowers that look lovely on the dining room table. There really isn't much else I can do. My sister pointed out that as long as we aren't selling crack out of the garbage or living like pigs wallowing in our own mire, we'll probably be approved. Still, I, of course, want things perfect. This is really odd because we are not Stepford people, and I am not really a perfectionist. I just feel like my entire future rests of what happens for a few hours tomorrow. Ironically fifteen year old crack whore get pregnant with now problem. We go through this. I don't mean to sound bitter, and I'm not really. I'm just a little tired and overwhelmed. Actually I've made peace with the process, and my heart doesn't hurt anymore. It's just anxious to get to the next step.
Eric is really anxious to get to the next step because it must be difficult living with such a fluffernutter.
I've been scouring craigslist, Babies R' Us and Target for a bassinet and cribs. I think I'll feel better if I have some sign that this is really happening.
Please think of me tomorrow.

Welcome to the Freak Show
I've gotten a little clean crazy. Today I--
--made Eric clean his car just in case she decides to check there
--scrubbed all of the baseboards on my hands and knees
--swept the backyard. Yes, that's right--I could not stand that there was dirt in the outside world!
--trimmed Toby's tail so he looks more put together
I even considered cleaning the firewood, but I stopped the madness there.
I know this is going to go well, but it is too important to blow off. Tomorrow I will put the finishing touches on the house and maybe get some flowers. Maybe I'll bake cookies and make lemonade to further the aura of domesticity. I'm currently watching a cake competition on Food Network. If I thought it would help I'd try to sugar sculpt too!
I think I'm having nesting issues too because I keep searching craigslist for deals on baby stuff. It might be another year, but I want everything done now! We're having to redo the office to make room for a nursery, but I can't really get it done until the comics get out of the room. This is making my stress level rise as no one has bid on our e-bay auction yet. It isn't even about the money anymore (although we certainly need it), I really just want them out of the house. 7,500 comic books take up a lot of room!
Last night we found a place that would give Baby A's a run for its money. It's called Baja Mex, and it has the strongest ritas I've ever tasted. Holy cow. I think the food was pretty good, but after the rita I can't really remember. To be honest it was a little much. Still, it made for a fun, quiet night.
I have to figure out something to do with my afternoon or else I will start cleaning air vents, and no one wants that.

Message in a Bottle
Part of getting ready for the homestudy in a few days involves scrubbing my baseboards. The more exciting part is putting together a Dear Birthmother Letter which is what the pregnant moms see when they are making their decisions. I think I have come up with something that is pretty good. What do you think?
Birthmother%20letter.pub

It's Official
Neither Eric nor I are going to die of TB.
As a fan of 19th century literature I am, of course, a little disappointed. I have always enjoyed the image of the poor consumptive sent to recuperate in an overcast beach town on the south English coast who meets her great love yet realizes it is all doomed. Of course I've already met my great love, so all in all I suppose not dying a horrific, hacking death is a happy thing.
Plus it is another item to cross off the paperwork list.
That and Eric is currently installing an alarm that is supposed to sound if anyone tries to open the patio door and head out to the pool. I'm not sure if it will work, but it certainly is producing a hideous noise every few seconds. So, it's got that going for it. . . which is nice.

The Stars at Night
I'm having one of those rare lazy days that typically goes against everything I stand for. I have not gone swimming yet. I have not gone to the gym. I have not moved furniture. I have not tried to make money. I have not cleaned a darn thing. What I have done is lie aroud reading a book. I don't even feel that bad about it. (YET)
I had another sewing lesson yesterday, and I finished up the too cute table cloth. I'll post a pic later. We also made a cute little skirt. Then we hit the big time and went to the fabric store where I got some freakin' adorable fabrics to start crafting all sorts of faboo projects. I am currently working on a little sundress that is too precious for words. This could be just the hobby I was looking for.

Tonight we're hitting Shakespeare in the Park which is one of my all time favorite things to do. We like to bring a picnic, a bottle of wine, and blankets and let the evening unfold. Shakespeare was meant for open air.

Burn, Baby, Burn
If you were planning on dying in a horrible fiery rage, do not come to our house! I've been working on fire proofing for our homestudy next week. I was suppsoed to get my fire extinguisher serviced, but that turned into a fiasco. No place in Grapevine services them, so I got directions to a Fire Supply company in Hurst and drove all the way out there. Unbeknownst to me, the business was in this run down old house in a residential neighborhood which freaked me out a little bit. I almost walked away, but then the 75 year old in dickies came out of the garage. He took one look at the extinguisher and told me just to go to Lowes to buy a new one. That was really a piece of information I could have used before driving out to Hurst. After an interlude at Half Price Books where I continued my sell everything trend, I went to Lowes and bought out there fire safety section. WE now own two extinguishers, 2 smoke detectors and a fire ladder in case the stairway is blocked in an emergency. I am prepared for anything. Or at least anything involving flames.
Wow, looking at the title of the post it is pretty horrific. I didn't mean it!

Ok, this will be my last post of the day. Three is a little ridiculous.

Like An Ox
Pending the results of blood tests and smears, I appear to be in peak physical condition. Woo hoo! I will say, though, I was less than impressed with the newest innovations in medical apparel. I wore a little paper/plastic ensemble that tied around my body with a little elastic band. It was simultaneously too big (picture shoulder pads from the 80s) and too small (barely covering the butt). Luckily they gave me an oh so protective little rippled paper "blanket" to preserve my modesty! Somehow I think once they've attached monitors to your chest and put your feet in stirrups, you've lost any modesty. Regardless, it's one more hurdle checked off of the list.
This afternoon I have to drive to Hurst to get my fire extinguisher refilled and to buy a fire ladder to escape the top floor in case of emergency. I am determined to pass this homestudy with flying colors.
I might be obsessing.

Random Fun
I saw this on another blog and wanted to try it.
Go to Google and type in (your name)needs
Amy needs some help drinking apparently--this is actually true, I can't tell you how often I spill whatever I'm drinking on myself. It's lucky that I usually just drink water!

Type in (your name)looks like
Amy looks like she’s about to sneeze--Just thinking about it actually makes me want to sneeze. Ah, the power of suggestion.

Type in (your name) does
Amy does it again. Whatever "it" is, I'm sure I've done it.

Type in (your name) hates
Amy hates bamboo and mylar balloons I dig bamboo in the wild and in floors but can't stand it in cheesey furniture. I am not a huge balloon fan either.

Type in (your name )goes to
Amy goes to OZ This is so appropriate since I wrote my master's thesis on L. Frank Baum and the spectle of OZ.

Type in (your name) loves
Amy loves books. As I am currently reading 3 books at the moment, I must agree. I never leave the house without a book in my bag because you neverknow when you might get a few minutes to read a few pages.

Type in (your name) eats
Amy eats garbage. This is typically pretty untrue. I'm a veg head and a bit of a health nut. Yesterday, however, I did have a cookie.

Type in (your name) has
Amy has a crush on a shadow. I'm not quite sure what to make of this but I like the way it sounds. Perhaps it's because I'm already in love with a child that most likely has not even been conceived yet.

Type in (your name) will
Amy will perform at Glastonbury. Yeah, so a lot of my stuff was based on Amy Winehouse. I picked this one because it did not reference her drug habit. That being said, I'd love to go back to England someday with Eric. Our list of places we'd like o travel grows by the day.

I'm a bit of a crankypants today because I am fasting for my physical which is not until ten. It did not help that I had to make Eric his lunch and breakfast and then watch him eat waffles and drink my favorite herbal tea. This also means that I have not gotten in my morning swim because I do not want to entirely deplete myself. So I sit and wait. I'm not terribly good at either one!

Aside from a few appointments today, my goal is to find someone to refill my fire extinquisher in preparation for our homestudy next week. I have to figure out if we need additional fire alarms. I'm a little bit of a fluffernutter about the whole thing.

Yesterday mom began teaching me how to sew. I made some napkins and am working a really cute summer table cloth that is precious. I am nowhere near competent yet, but I enjoyed learning. I think this is something that I could really grow to like. I've always wanted to be one of those crafty people who made their own clothes, and now I get my chance. I might be heading back to my early bohemian days! One could do worse. Perhaps my Ann Taylor days are behind me--which would be good since I promised Eric I would not buy any clothes until we've paid for the adoption. I didn't say anything about not making clothes. . .
My google search should have read Amy is a sly lizard!

Two Milestones
Today I reached two monumental milestones.
1) I finally finished cataloguing the comics and placed them for sale. I'm trying big lots first, but if that doesn't work then I will have to get creative and divide the collection into smaller chunks. I am anticipating this, but still it feels good to have the hard part done. If you know anyone interested in comics, please comment and I will send a link to the listings.
2) Our homestudy has been scheduled for July 15! This is actually happening.

Not quite a milestone, but I also sold the guest bed to make room for a nursery. I also sold the baker's rack for some extra cash. I'm on a sales frenzy. . . there will soon be nothing left in the house! I just can't help but think that with every dollar I earn we are closer to the amount needed to bring home our baby.

Sparkling
Despite the fact that I did not get to fire even one Roman Candle nor did I get to hold a simple sparkler, we had a wonderful 4th of July weekend complete with bbq, swimming pools, bike rides, family, and square pie.
At the last minute Eric's parents announced that they were coming for the weekend, so we got to play host. I love helping others enjoy the town I love. On Thursday we met them at the ridiculously fabulous Gaylord Texan and had drinks and dinner. It is a cheesy place, but I got such a kick out of kicking back in their veranda sipping a margarita doing a little people watching. On Friday we toured downtown Grapevine and indulged in the chill Tap-In Pub. Later we had a pool party/bbq and watched the fireworks from the front lawn. I was mesmerized and reduced to child-like giggles, oohs and aahs. I've always loved fireworks, but ever since watching Lord of the Rings, I've imagined the fire forming dragons, faeries and spirits. Silly, but true.
On Saturday morning we went on a long bike ride around the lake before picking up the in-laws and heading to the Kimball Museum in Ft.Worth for the Impressionist exhibit which is on loan from the Art Institute of Chicago. Some words to describe the show: mind-blowing, transcendent, evanescent, luminescent, but perhaps my favorite would be wow. It's funny, I am not even a huge impressionist fan, but this exhibit in the intense space that the Kimball offers opened my mind. One of the testaments to the power of the exhibit is that the fact that everyone in the crowded rooms was silent, letting the colors wash over them. The crowd was cowed by color. Amazing.
Anyway, that night we all went to my parents' house for a faboo family dinner which included the aforementioned square pie. As we were questioning my father's choice of dessert shapes, he came back with "As I remember: pie are squared. (pi r squared)." Who could argue with that?
Today we had a rather disappointing afternoon--we saw Wanted which was, in my opinion, a pretty terrible movie with fantastic special effects. We capped off the weekend with a sweaty and wonderful workout that almost made up for the square pie.

We are supposed to have our home study this week, but we still have not heard exactle when she is coming. This might actually work in my favor as I cannot really freak out about it if I have no idea when it is happening. I read a few books on adoption this weekend including A Love Like No Other and The Family of Adoption, and I am getting excited but realizing more and more how important all of our choices will be. I want to do this right so we can give our child the best possible support system and start in this world. One of the things this weekend taught me is that I cannot wait to share traditions and family and fireworks with my child.

4200
That's the current comic book count. I have made it all the way to Ms. Marvel. Is alphabetizing a super power?

K
I have just reached the K section of the great comic book project. I have officially catalogued 3,300 comics and according to the values book I have 13,000 some odd dollars worth of comics so far. I know I won't actually get that much money, but if I can get even half of it, our adoption journey will go so much more smoothly. Perhaps I will reconsider the names--maybe we should go the Nic Cage route and name the kid Ka'el or She-ra or something. Perhaps Lily "She Hulk" Bresie? Joseph "Iron Man" Bresie? Just an idea.
I have somehow screwed up my neck and have been relatively still today. It's ok as long as I don't turn my head. Head turning, however, as I have discovered is actually necessary for most everyday activities. Who knew? You know you are getting old when you can injure yourself doing nothing. I'm pretty sure I did this when I was doing stomach crunches. That will teach me.
So I'm a little obsessed with the new Korean market that just opened. They have ridiculously cheap produce as well as Asian specialities. I now dream of fruits and veggies. I just had a peach which was so ripe that it sent juices cascading down my arms. Being covered in peach sticky sweetness always tells me that summer is here. (That and the 100 degree temps)
I made our final travel arrangements in Utah yesterday. I am looking forward to roaming the canyons and going stargazing with Eric. From all accounts this area of Utah is as geologically remarkable as the Grand Canyon area with a small fraction of the tourists. We are staying at a little bed and breakfast that overlooks Bryce Point and is just 3 miles from the park. And with that inspiration I need to go back upstairs to catalogue comic books to pay for all of this splendor.