Things I learned today:
1. Before you drill holes in the wall, it is a good idea to measure first.
2. You cannot say the word "menopause" to 8th grade boys. That ties in to somehting I learned a few months ago: you cannot ever mention diaherria(?) in middle school, no matter the context.
3. I need to give up sugar, it does bad things to my body. I start getting chills and feeling all wonky.
4. D. has repressed his so-called interpretive dance period.
5. The article "Reproduction, Contestation, and Curriculum" neither has something to do with sex nor is it written in common English. For example: "These forms of knowledge, or 'cultural capital'--and the ideology of rationalization that both supports and is in part engendered by it--is employed in the economy and increasingly in the state as the state itself becomes caught in the larger crisis of capital accumulation and legitimation." One word: Bullshit.
6. I really like using colons.
7. The absolute value of -56x is equal to 56 times the absolute value of x. Fascinating.

At this rate, I'll be brillant in no time. ....

Further Doggie Drama
Picture this: I am all dressed up because I have to teach this afternoon. I have just gotten back some wedding pictures, and I'm sitting on the couch reliving the happiest day of my life. Suddenly, Toby jumps up behind me and throws up all over me. He even hit the album a little (luckily the pics were not harmed). For those of you keeping tabs, yes, the dog has now peed, pooped and vomited on me.

Sleepy and much to do.
I had to take Toby to the grooming place today, and I even picked him up again. I guess I was in a genrous mood.
I ahd to teach typing to a million lower school students. If I see that typing program again it will be too soon. I hate giving assignmetns that I know suck. How can I expect kids to do something that bores the pants off me. Well, if I had lost my pants that would at least have been exciting.
Anyway, I've been working on homework stuff all night and I show no signs of finsihing anytime soon. I have a test and paper due thursday, a lesson plan due tomorrow, my final presentation due on monday, and my portfolio due next friday. Problem is I'm having a hard time caring. I can only hope that this will actually lead somewhere.
I'm freaked out. . . after May 28th I have no frickin' idea what I"m doing. I don't knwo about the summer, and I don't know about the fall. I have no way of bringing any money in any time soon. Yet, I have plans for spending some money. Hopefully somehting will work out that will not require the selling of my soul.
E. already went to bed. Perhaps I should join him cause I'm not being inspired here.
I pick up wedding pics tomorrow! Happiness!
I also have my last day at Connally. I will sniff dramatically.

Here's a hint.
When a package says it requires professional installation, go ahead and get it done professionally. WE spent all day putting in this pot rack, getting progressively more frustrated. At one point we had 5 people in the kitchen shouting orders.
The lulau last night was most excellent. I met a guy who uses the hulk hand as a koozie WE also did naked hot tubbing which was relaxing and wonderful. I could have stayed in all night, but I began to prune. Tragic. Pineapple makes me happy.
I don't think I've caught up on sleep since the wedding, and I've started to nod off at all times. I feel vaguely narcoleptic.
I'm in the middle of a million projects, and no sooner do I work on one, but I decide to start another one. It seems finishing is slightly beyond me. Tomrrow I work, finish my power point presentation, go to class, work out, and then come home to write more thank you notes and perhaps mop the floor. The next time I start something, someone needs to beat me over the head with a frozen food item.
Since last night I"ve been craving Krispy Kreme--must go see if I can find a replacement.

The dog and I need to be separated.
I took a big blue marker and wrote EVIL on his tummy when he wouldn't shut up the other day.
I have had many, many bad thoughts. The funny part is, sometimes he's a fantastic dog, mainly when he sleeps.

Today is Iggy Pop's birthday. He makes me happy and I want to jump up and down when I hear him.

I taught Romeo and Juliet today and it went uberwell--we identified all the types of love in the play, adn then we cast our own movie. They had Queen Latifah as the nurse. Kids are brillant. I want to see thier movie.
I was also invited to a tea party and had truffles and earl gray. It was a happy sort of afternoon. I met the Latin teacher who is a bad ass. In one converstaion he both talked about the Oxford English Dictionary and how you're always someone's bitch. We talked much about Jack Black who is my new lovely hero.

Tonight it's off to see my lurvely friend Beth's band Pickletink. It's my favorite name for a band. It's at this circus themed bar--I'm a sucker for anything circus. I wanted to join the circus for a long time, but I have no talent and am afraid of heights. I always thought I could be one of those girls who sits on top of hte elephants and gets picked up by their trunks. I'd more likely be the girl to scoop gallons of elephant poop though. Someday. . .

I am still reeling emotionally from the weekend. I could not believe how perfectly the day went. Even the weather went against the forecasters and was beautiful. The day is still a little bit of a blur for me though. Between the two of us, I think we remember most of it.
I was calm and collected before the wedding, but when my dad came to get me in the dressing room, I burst into tears. I actually cried down the aisle until I got to Eric. I was just completely overcome with emotions. During the ceremony, every time I would start to cry, Cranky stuck her tongue out at me whcih kept me smiling. If you read this, thanks Cranky! Eric's vows were beautiful, and I know he worked so hard on them. Later I found all of his drafts.
After the kiss, I couldn't help it, I yelled "yay!" I couldn't stop laughing for the rest of the day.
The reception was so nice, and I only wish we could have stayed longer. It was this amazing feeling to realize that there were almost 100 people there and all they were all there just because they loved and supported Eric and I. I have never felt so loved in my life. I've also never felt as beautiful. I'll post a link to pictures when I get some scanned in.

Everytime I start to think about all of the money trouble and other trauma, I try to remember the happiness of the day, and then it's not so bad.

I taught Romeo and Juliet today. . . the only drawback was not being able to explain the filthy jokes to the freshmen. I asked but was denied. It's too bad cause I think they would like it more if they understood that Shakespeare was a dirty birdy. "I'll cut off the heads of the maids, or their maidenheads. Take it in whatever sense you will. .."
The wedding is now a little over 3 days away. I have finally reached a peace about the whole thing. It will happen whether I spend the next three days freaking out or not. In the end, the positoin of helium balloons or the number of bags of iced tea really don't make much of a difference. I am ready for this. I also can't wait to be done with all of the craziness.
here's a free hint to anyone trying to get married: you only really need 6 months or less to plan a wedding. The more time you have, the more time you have to stress.
My lovely cousin Muffin (yes, I did say Muffin) hurt her sciatic nerve adn is now unable to attend the wedding. I am so sad because she's the coolest member of my family. For my graduation, we took her out drinking and dancing, and she outlasted us all. Everyone should have a cousin muffin. I'm convinced this could lead to world peace or something.
We rented So I Married an Axe Murder last night. Such yummy fun. Any movie with hagis and beat poets is bound to be brillant. It made me feel better too becuase at least I know that E is not a psycho killer. That I know of.
I made my favorite, green bean casserole, and I am salivating just thinking about its fibery goodness. Must attack fridge.

I"m trying my best to learn algebra the week of my wedding. I seem to be getting dumber by the day. I guess the quadratic equation makes me neurotic enough to forget about wedding nerves. If I dont' pass the CLEP test, I will have to take Algebra this summer and I'd rather suck a hobbit's foot. My problem is I"m gimpy at math. E. was trying to help me this morning before he left for work, but I'm not sure even he can plumb the depths of my mathmatical issues. I have a big positive/negative problem, that and I really don't care about x or y. I have a horrid attitude, for a person trying to be a teacher, I sure have a crappy attitude as a student.
Went to church on Easter, and I got all choked up because I realized that the next time I would be there is for the rehearsal. I can't wait for the actual wedding part. I just want it to all be over. Can the big party be worth all of the expense and hassle and stress? I had wanted just a handful of people, but that was not to be. Between our mother's our intimate wedding has risen to 100 people. I"m sure it will all be amazing though, and I won't be able to imagine it any other way.
Somehow it still seems unreal. factoring equations seems a little safer than contemplating how the rest of my life changes completely in a few days.
I have to go by and see the cake lady this afternoon. I have to give her a lot of money, but the bonus is that once I do that, I am done paying for stuff. I have been sucked beyond dry. Maybe she'll give me cake. I would do horrible things for a piece of chocolate cake.
Had my bachlorette party on friday. I was a devil bride, complete with horns. Very delicious fun. Also ran into this chica I went to high school with. Must call her after all the craziness. So weird to see those people I used to know when we were all different.
An old teacher also threw me a party this weekend. It was relaxing and wonderful. I'm lucky to have such fab people still in my life.
Having dinner with the lovely seth and alex this evening. I wonder if they know advanced math. . .

I just moved in to E's house. For whatever reason, I am having trouble understanding the fact that I will not be going home, that this is home. It's very surreal to me. I guesss when I don't ahve to go home on Sunday night, it will feel more real to me. I'm excited, and terrified, and giddy and nervous. I think I'm actually more stressed about the move than the wedding. It will be interesting these first few months.
I bought my dress for the bachelorette party today. It's the sexiest/skimpiest thing I've ever worn. I've never felt slinkier than I did in that dressing room. It's the sort of fantastic little red number that I never thought I could ever fit into. Everyone needs to have one like it. Strapless too. It will be quite a night. Someone must take photos.
On a separate note--it is so beautiful here. Texas in the spring makes those truly miserable summer days more bearable. It's why we live here and love it. The wildflowers are out everywhere, and you see people stopping all over town to take thier baby's photos in the bluebonnets. The grass and trees are almost sinfully green. It's like the whole world is shot in technicolor for these few weeks. Sometimes just the scene from the ordinarily ugly IH-35 takes my breath away. it's funny how spring always catches me by surprise. Every year it's like I'd never seen the flowers, the leaves, the trees before. Of course, driving in my unairconidtioned car in August will have me singing a different tune about the state.